..:: ZOMBiE Destinee ::..

Wednesday, August 30, 2006
The Last Call
[ZOMBiE CyGiG] ranted at 12:32 AM --- Post#115687050571297214

Im trying yo nlog from my phone, but long blog are just near impossible...So i decided to take out my Craptop despite banning myself from computers till Thursday. I wanna try see if really not touching the computer will help me focus and concentrate on my studies. So far...well...i can find more ways of slacking even w/o computer. No games, no suft net, no IM, no photoshop, no Flash... Shall see.

Tml will the the last day of formal school in AJC for these 2 years. Thursday is Teacher Day celebration, Friday is teacher day hol. Next week is Sept hols and then followed by prelim. I doubt i will come back to school after prelim except to take back my prelim paper or smthing. So i guess tml is the last day le.

Finally... all the crapping will end. But then...looking at A's, NS, Uni/fail A's and not going anywhere, i still prefer the 2 years of crapping in AJC. My life is getting more and more crap.

Im losing myself. For all these while, no matter what disaster happen to me. Me is still Zombie, and me is still CyGiG. The sucker, slacker, lamer, complainer who hated and being cynical about everything. The one whol never believe in the norm and what to be guai lan and always do things the different, or rather the WRONG, way. There is no way for me to defeat this fucking education system. Even JJ thinks Uni cert is important. No choice, you EITHER mugg and pass your exams, go uni and come out do a job (most likely smthing i wun like cos my score wun give me the choice) and earn some money to eat three meals, OR you fail your exam, mother father get overly upset, teacher give up on you, school think u useless, society say "No cert No go" and you become road sweeper and eat rubbish and grass everyday. Shortcuts? Alternatives? Authorities always say no such thing. Must mugg and mugg and no shortcuts no alternatives, although i believe there IS other way round to do things the more funa nd meaningful way, im not the lucky and smart one to discover this route. Thus...i have to mugg...i have to ban myself from computer. I hate this. This is no zombie....this is not underground...this is not darkness...

These 2 years felt soooo long. Cos just too many things happened all along. Most are more than depressing. "ZOMBiE" describes my character as above, being slack, lame, guai lan...etc. "ZOMBiE" never comes out in me until i discovered this wonderful place call AJC. How ugly ppl are and how being clear in your understanding and what you see make this world look so bad. "CyGiG" is the technical inclined part of me developed in VS.

My Nick changes to reflect myself. Maybe next time my nick will change again.

Tml will be the last day of lesson. Should be happy. After that i will wipe my memory off AJC, as if no such thing happen. Of course the memory of that chao chee bye will still be remembered FOREVER. I want her come say sorry to me personally before i forgive her.

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